Tonight on Aging Sluts: The aging slut paradox: that as we age, we learn to value and respect ourselves more, even as our sluttiness is valued and respected less by others.
Education
Me, reading or watching educational content: “Huh, that’s interesting” or “Hmm, that seems fishy, I should check that out.” Inevitable comment on the content: “WHY THE FUCK WASN’T I MADE AWARE OF THIS IN SCHOOL?!!!" For fuck sakes, get a grip, youngster. While I have no doubt that your education system has failed you, it … Continue reading Education
Quality Programming
Tonight on Aging Sluts:Making the most of incontinence through fetish play.
White People’s Gift
Tonight in one of my English conversation classes (here in Japan), we were discussing eating habits and weight gain. One of my students proclaimed that it’s okay to get fat; especially for white people. “Most white people look Doraemon shape,” she said. (Doraemon pictured below for reference.) “But,” she went on, “it’s okay. It’s a … Continue reading White People’s Gift
Superpower
by Balls Malone If I could have one superpower it would be to be able to transcend space and time to have three-ways with Queen Elizabeth II and Betty White in 1945. More specifically, that all three of us rendezvous in a suitably groovy trans-dimensional place, with them being their respective ages from that year. … Continue reading Superpower
Quality Programming
Tonight on Aging Sluts: Michael Douglas talks about getting throat cancer from eating pussy.
Research
Anytime someone you’re talking to starts mentioning their “research,” beware. Best case scenario is, they are some kind of university troglodyte that somehow hasn’t learned that their life’s work isn’t something other people want to hear about. This is just awkward and dull. So not unlike many conversations, really. More often that not, however, it’s … Continue reading Research
Poser Monotheists
Always keep in mind that, all their shit-talking about being monotheists aside, Catholics are polytheistic; with all their praying to God, and the Son, and the Holy Ghost, and the Virgin Mary, and the various patron saints of getting diddled by priests.
Proof of Difference
“I need you to prove to me that you're not like all the others,” she said, staring deeply into his eyes. He thought about it for a while and then he did. He walked away from her and never once looked back.
Write By Numbers
(1) (2) , (2) (1) ! 1 = "fuck"2 = "you"
Muse Vassal 