Robot Tears
In the future when the Earth is a toxic wasteland and the descendants of the 1% live in space, toilets are a thing of the past. The Gentle Shitsucker line of robots cleanse and pleasure as they dispose of human waste. With a wide variety of RealFlesh orifice attachments, they can be tailored to suit … Continue reading Robot Tears
Alcohol isn't a social lubricant; drunks just think it is. Then they give non-drinkers the conversational equivalent of a spit-lubed ass fuck.
Real Value
A lot of so-called value in the stock market is based on the notion that advertising works and is valuable. Google and facebook are only as valuable as they are because the market assumes that their audience’s attention has a certain value for advertisers. They are basing this on old notions like a billboard having … Continue reading Real Value
"Sometimes I'll get a whole finger up my ass before I realize what I'm doing. Then I'm like: Goddamnit, this dollar store doesn't even have a bathroom." Balls Malone
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American Party
Being a citizen of a client nation of the American empire has always required a certain level of cognitive dissonance and culpability. How do we balance what is marvelous about America with what is evil? It’s like America is throwing a fantastic barbecue party. There are clowns and a bouncy castle for the kids. There’s … Continue reading American Party
Business!
In my particular demographic, not getting a tattoo is really the ultimate counterculture expression.
The Secret of My Non-Success
For years I had this default mental mechanism to seeing successful people; particularly artists and creators. I’d go into this pouty, self-pity-party mode with the central theme being: “Why can’t I have that? Why do they get to have that and I don’t?” It took a surprisingly long time for me to figure out the … Continue reading The Secret of My Non-Success
Muse Vassal 