table of contents – (spoilers)
Riding back from Gotthilf’s cottage was not easy. Pinch had lost his horse, Knickers, to the moose attack, and had to double up with someone. As well, they pulled his saddle off the carcass, which created even more trouble. All of their horses were already loaded up with the bundles of arrows and bows that they had bought from Gotthilf. They decided not to leave anything behind, so they distributed the arrows from Knuckle and Pinch’s saddles to Choke, Peep, and Dom’s. It was barely manageable. Then, Pinch doubled-up behind Knuckle with his own saddle over his shoulders. It was a slow ride back to Bristlenook, and an utterly miserable one for Pinch as he struggled to stay on Knuckle’s saddle and not drop his own.
They rode in silence for a while, with Peep out in front, Choke following her, Knuckle and Pinch behind him, and Dom taking up the rear. Finally, when they had reached the trails closer to Bristlehump and could hear the sounds of lumbering in the forest around them, Knuckle spoke up:
“So, Peep! Ye gonna tell us what all ye talked about with that cunt witch? Ye were in the bush together a long fuckin while!”
“I aint gonna yodel it to the hills. Short version is: she told us to fuck off,” Peep called back to him.
“Oh, no doubt? That much time just to tell ye that? She said as much before she went back to get yar horse for ye!” Knuckle pressed, all but yelling up the trail at Peep’s back.
Peep sighed and wheeled Gorgeous Boy around to face back as she stopped.
“No. That aint it at all, Knucklehead. Yar misremembering. Gorgeous Boy came back to us all by himself. Because he’s a good boy,” Peep said, stroking and patting her mount’s neck. “Diya never did shit for us. We’re all clear on that?”
“Okay, what the fuck is this bullshit now!” Knuckle exploded. “That witch cunt jacked us up with her devil spells. And now yar playing cute like there’s some kinda deal with her! Fuck that! We’re gonna go back to town, get Barrelmender riled up, and head back out there with all the men and light her the fuck up! That’s what’s gonna happen next! Right?”
“Could we please get a fuckin move on! Please!” Pinch yelled plaintively from behind Knuckle.
“Knuckle, Pinch is right,” Peep said. “This aint the fuckin time or the place to get into this. But as we head back, ponder this nugget, if ye can: she coulda killed all of us, easy. Any time she wanted. Just her and that one bowman she had in the bush. Given who we are and what she is, she did us a solid letting us go. If ye can’t see that, I don’t know what to tell ye. Let’s go.”
They got back to Bristlehump just before lunch. There was a big raven up on the north gate, pecking at Reece’s face. Peep gave it a real long look as she rode under the gate. She could have sworn it winked at her.
Barrelmender was in the courtyard running the men through fighting drills. Now that the men were performing better, his instruction was somewhat more constructive than abusive.
Knuckle was only halfway through the courtyard to the stables when Pinch dropped his saddle and almost collapsed off the back of the horse. Pinch left the saddle where it fell and stumbled off to the latrines.
“He did have a horse when he left, did he not?” Barrelmender asked.
“Yeah, there was a complication, Brother. We’ll get into it later,” Peep said, still on horseback.
“If you feel you must. It is almost lunch, isn’t it? And you are back? Good. Very well, men! You have done well enough today. Improving moderately! You just might survive a mild skirmish with goblins. You may rest until lunch. Dismissed!”
The men gratefully broke out of their fighting formations and wandered off to their usual haunts around the barracks.
“I shall be at the church if you need me,” Barrelmender told Choke and Peep. “I will take a nap after lunch, so unless absolutely necessary, do not bother me until late afternoon.”
“Yes, Brother. Thank you for your help this morning,” Choke said.
Barrelmender ignored him completely and left for the church, striding with something almost approaching purpose.
Peep and Choke rode to the stables, where Knuckle and Dom had already dismounted.
“Dom,” Peep said, “the LT and me will get the horses put away. You get the arrows and the new bows squared away in the armory. Then ye can do as ye please. But don’t say shit to anybody about what happened out there. We got what we needed from the fletcher and leave it at that. Got it?”
“Yes, sir. But what do I tell them if they ask about Sergeant Nikolas’ horse?”
“Ye tell them to shut the fuck up and mind their business.”
“Yes, sir,” Dom said. He immediately started working on untying the bundles of arrows from his saddle.
Knuckle glowered down at Peep for a moment before shrugging and looking away. “Fuck it,” he said, as he ambled back across the courtyard to pick up Pinch’s saddle and bring it to the stables.
Choke and Peep had both finished stacking the arrow bundles on one of the benches at the stable wall by the time he returned. Knuckle went through into the stable to put Pinch’s saddle away.
“Thank you, Knuckle. That was a nice gesture,” Choke said when Knuckle came back out.
“Sure. Fuck it. He’s had a rough day. Another one of his stupid named horses eats shit. Like that means anything. But I’m guessing he’s gonna take it hard, like that last one,” Knuckle said. He untied his black stallion and brought it through into the stable.
“I can take care of him, Knuckle, if you’d prefer to go and be with the men,” Choke said.
“Nah, that’s fine, Choke. Brushing down the horses is where you and Peep have yar little private conversations. Reckon I’d like to be part of this one. The start of it, at least,” Knuckle shot Peep a look.
The three of them were still brushing their horses in silence when Pinch joined them in the stable.
“Thanks for putting my saddle away, Choke,” he said.
“Knuckle was the one that did it,” Peep said. Choke nodded.
“Really? Well, thanks then.”
“Fuck it. Rough day for ye. Just spare me any fuckin whinging about the stupid horse it was on. Alright?”
Pinch looked like he might respond to that, but chose to let it go. He sat down on a hay bale and watched them brush their horses.
“I guess that horse is mine now, then, huh?” Pinch gestured to the horse that Barrelmender had taken to Spitzer.
“Whichever one you want, Pinch. It’s a fine mount. I believe it was Dixon’s. It should be yours, now,” Choke said.
“Thank you. So… what the fuck was that?” Pinch asked the group at large.
“Thank you! That cunt’s gotta get dead!” Knuckle almost shouted.
“Keep yar fuckin voice down, Knucklehead!” Peep snapped.
“Okay. But am I wrong?” he returned, his voice moderately quieter.
“Ye aint. But ye don’t have a clear notion of the full picture here,” Peep said.
“Yeah, no shit! So how’s about ye help us out with that? Why did ye say that yar horse came back all by himself? And why did the cunt bring him back to ye anyways, if she just told ye to fuck off? And why did we have to stand there for half a fuckin hour listening to Thad go on about ass play? He told us he wants us to experience the full release of prostate milking! I didn’t even know what a prostate was this fuckin morning! The fuck, man! What the fuck!” Knuckle shouted, suddenly irate.
“Hush, Knuckle. Please,” Choke said. “I think Thad starts talking about that stuff to men like us when he’s feeling threatened. Because it puts us on the back foot.”
“Yeah, no shit it does! I don’t need to be hearing about that!”
“I agree. But that is, maybe, not the most important element of what went on there today. Your earlier questions to Peep, about Diya’s intentions and what they talked about, were more on point,” Choke said.
“I dunno, man,” Pinch interjected. “I’m starting to think Thad might be onto something. I might give some of that a whirl.” Pinch raised two fingers with a twirling up-thrust.
Peep barked a laugh at this.
Knuckle looked like he might get even more angry, before he burst into booming laughter. Once he had control of himself, Knuckle swallowed some air and burped, “queer!” at Pinch.
“I am glad our humor has returned. But, I don’t think we should all be in here for too long. One of us, at least, should be with the men,” Choke said.
“There’s three corporals with them. They should be fine,” Knuckle said confidently.
“Do you feel so, Knuckle?” Choke asked earnestly.
“Yeah. The men have fallen in line. Pretty good, anyways. And they listen to the corporals, from what I can tell. We got a few minutes, at least. And none of them are gonna run off right before lunch. Not after Barrelmender’s been working them all morning!” Knuckle laughed.
“Well, you do have a point there, I think. Okay, then. But we shouldn’t take any longer than is necessary. And I don’t think that now is the time for Peep to discuss what happened,” Choke said.
Knuckle scowled, and Pinch slumped back with a sigh.
“Ye mean we aint important enough to be told, is what yar saying,” Knuckle said.
“That is not how I would put it,” Choke said.
“Of course. Ye try to be nice to us,” Pinch said. “But that’s the heart of it.”
Choke looked pained and stared up at the ceiling, searching for something to say.
“Fuck all of ye’s and yar weak bullshit,” Peep said. “I share what I think needs sharing, with them that need to know. And if ye think that’s any different now than it’s been since we started riding together, then ye got more shit in between yar ears than is on this floor. So, I’m gonna tell all three of ye now what happened. And that’s what yar gonna know, until I decide I need ye to know more. Clear?”
Peep glared at all three men in turn before continuing:
“Diya didn’t return this horse to me. He came back on his own. She was mean and nasty from start to finish. And she had plenty to say on that, but it aint anything ye need to hear right now. And we aint gonna go back to Bristlenook until we can have a good think about why we might need to do that. Because today she showed us that, out there at least, she can kill us pretty much anytime she wants. And I aint gonna put my head on a platter for her. Right? That’s that.”
“That’s a load of bullshit,” Knuckle muttered. At least his heat about it seemed to be gone.
“I dunno,” Pinch said, slapping both of his knees as he stood up and stretched out his shoulders with a groan. “They coulda killed us easily out there today. Peep’s right on that. Diya knew exactly where we were. She’s known every time we’re over that way. She’s got her bird snitches, and they see us coming. And whoever she had in the bush there on the bow: that fucker can shoot.”
“And cast spells,” Choke interjected. “The moose and the boar were both summoned animals. Those are spells that must be cast. The moose attacked, then Diya swooped in and transformed from the hawk. Then she cast a spell. I expect the spell she cast was whatever blew your arrows up into the air. Then the boar showed up, but she didn’t cast a spell before it did. Not that I saw, anyways. Did anyone see her cast that spell?”
They all shook their heads.
“Right. So, maybe she cast those summoning spells before, and had them waiting in the bush. But, from what I was taught, spells like that don’t last very long. So it seems likely that one, or both, were cast by the bowman in the woods just before they showed themselves. So, to be safe, we have to assume there is yet another spellcaster out there with Diya. And one that use a longbow very well.”
“Right. Makes sense. So, it’s even worse than we thought.”
“Coulda been Thad,” Knuckle said.
They all scowled as they considered this possibility. It was Knuckle himself who dismissed this idea:
“Nah. Fuck that! No way that ass-eating fruit basket can handle a longbow like that.”
“It does boggle the mind,” Choke agreed. “But, to be fair, it is possible. The bottom line is that we just can’t know for sure. So that means that going out to Bristlenook is not an option. We’ve been run off. With authority. However, of course, I will discuss this matter with Brother Barrelmender this afternoon, after his nap, and see what his thoughts are. Peep, you will join me, yes?”
“Yeah, for sure. Wouldn’t miss it. So that’s that? Ye guys are all squared away?” Peep asked.
“Well, if yar saying that’s that, then that’s that,” Pinch said.
“Yeah. That’s that. But, Pinch, we should have a word about them new bows, right? The two deer bows are definitely beefier than the one ye’ve got. Ye might wanna step up to one of them.”
Pinch nodded. “Yeah, I’ll check that out.”
“Right. So, that means we got the one bigger one left. That should swap out to Dom. Then, Mariola said that she’s hunted deer before. That means that your old deer bow should go to her. That’ll free up the shortbow she’s on now. Then, we got Dom’s old shortbow, and the two we just bought from Gothilf, the greedy fuck. The kid Leof already has Lenny’s bow, so it’ll be him under Dom, plus four more. That’s perfect, right? We got a squad of five slingers under Hardmod, and now five shortbows under Dom.”
“That sounds excellent. Do you have a notion of who the bows should go to?” Choke asked.
Peep nodded and Pinch answered:
“Yeah. All the boys that have been on a bow before tried their hand at it when Leof won Lenny’s bow. We have four more, no problem.”
“No doubt,” Peep seconded. “But, we gotta get them in somebody’s hands and then give them, all of ye, really, some time to put lumber on target. How’s about right after lunch? I’ll go down to the Holy Wailers’ place with ye and Dom and the boys and help ye set it up, then I’ll leave ye to it when it’s time to go meet with Barrelmender.”
“That sounds good. But, probably, we should also start practicing with yar slingers, too, right? Like, figuring out how to fan out and stay out of each other’s way, and all that?” Pinch asked.
Choke leaned in to interject: “Actually, that is a very good point. We really should be practicing coordination with everyone. How are our archers and slingers going to break in and out of formation, and the like. How long do you think you need your archers and slingers by themselves before we start working on it with everyone?”
Peep shrugged. “I dunno. Not long. I mean, we already pretty much know who the bows are going to, so they may as well start practicing shooting from the shieldwall. And getting in and out of it, and all that. So probably we should work on that all together before we focus on just shooting, right?” she looked to Pinch to check his opinion.
Pinch nodded. “Yeah, I think so.”
“Okay, then,” Choke nodded emphatically. “After lunch, we’ll all go down to the Wilson place. We can let some townspeople know to ring a gate bell if anything happens. We won’t be far.”
“Yeah, should be fine,” Peep said.
“Good. Then once everyone’s reasonably coordinated together, you, Pinch, Dom, and Hardmod can work on shooting at the range. Knuckle and I can drill the rest of the men on getting in and out of formation. Then, once you feel your people are ready, we can incorporate them and practice shooting from the shieldwall. All of us that would normally be mounted should be mounted,” Choke said.
“Good call,” Peep agreed. “About that, Lenny was mounted. So, we got his horse to hand out now. And we’ve also shit the bed on using the other extra horses we got here. Pinch, yar taking Dixon’s there, that’s great. But we also got the two solid riding horses we got from taking down Tully’s and the one that Butters rode from Spitzer. Those need to get used.”
Choke flinched before nodding. “Yes. You are right. I’ve been remiss in this. What do you think? Who should have them?” Choke asked everyone.
“Barrelmender needs one,” Peep said.
“That’s true. Okay, so then there’s two more.”
“Well, Dom’s on a bush nag. It isn’t much of a proper horse,” Pinch said. “So, if he’s not attached to it, he should probably upgrade.”
“Agreed. So, now there’s his bush horse and one more proper one,” Choke said.
“Mariola,” Peep said, forcefully. “She needs one. Give her Dom’s nag. And fuck Dom if he has a problem with it.”
“Okay…” Choke said. “So, then, there’s just the one left.”
“That should go to Hardmod, or to Osgar. Right?” Peep asked.
Choke thought for just a second. “Yes. I think Hardmod. He’s meant to be a scout. Osgar is our NCO for the spearmen, so he should remain a footman. Give the horse to Hardmod. Do you agree, Knuckle?”
“Sure, whatever,” Knuckle said in his reflexively sullen way, before pausing to let his brain catch up. “Yeah, actually, that makes sense. Sure.”
“Good. So, that’s the horses brushed,” Peep said, clapping her brands together with a sharp crack. “Pinch, and Knuckle: why don’t ye go and chill out with the men. Make sure they aint cornholing each other too much. Choke: I reckon you and me should sit down for a nice cup a stug before lunch.”
“Uh-huh. And then ye can have the real talk about what happened with that cunt witch,” Knuckle snarked.
“Ye know, Knuckle, I keep telling people that ye aint anywheres near as stupid as ye seem at first, and it’s times like this that ye really show me I’m right! Ye got yar finger right on the pulse man!” Peep said.
“Just so long as it aint the one up his ass, like Thad!” Pinch laughed.
Pinch and Knuckle left together for the barracks. Choke and Peep gave them a minute before heading to the kitchen to get some stugroot.
“It’s a nice day, let’s have this outside on the stable benches,” Peep said.
Once they were seated there, Choke spoke up, getting angry as he went on:
“Peep, I hope you understand that we have every right to an explanation about what you and Diya discussed. She attacked us! And is clearly a druid of some power! She can only be our mortal enemy!”
Peep stared at him calmly before blowing across the top of her steaming mug and taking a small sip.
“I aint gonna argue all the nitty-gritty of all this with ye, man, but yar totally wrong on one front. You three don’t deserve shit. Knuckle and Pinch are yar sergeants, and, as a leader, ye can’t go sharing everything ye know with them just because they think yar their friend. Ye know that. Don’t be a fuckin idgit.”
Choke flinched, but nodded a small agreement with this.
“Fine. You don’t owe them anything. But you do owe an explanation to me.”
“Sure. And that’s why we’re sitting down together now. So, if yar ready to listen, I’ll get into it. But I don’t want ye to get all fucky with me about it until I’m done. No interruptions. Save it up for the end, and then we can get into it. Right?”
“Yes. Fine. I agree. Now, what did the two of you discuss?”
Peep went on to tell Choke everything, without changing any details. During her narrative, Choke sighed and flinched aplenty, but kept his word and did not interrupt. When she had finished, he had to take a moment to compose himself before responding:
“I have no idea where to begin with this, Peep. This is… fucking horrifying!”
“Yeah, I guess. Quite the mindfuck, huh?”
“Why did you shake her hand? What were you thinking?”
“Seemed like the thing to do.”
“What? How…” Choke stammered.
“Look. I got a real strong feeling that what she was saying was true. And when we shook hands, she got a dose. It was a pulse, from inside me, to her. Ye know what I’m talking about. Ye got one yarself. Right after the fire got into me. Ye remember that feeling, don’t ye?”
Choke took a long moment to compose himself before responding:
“Of course I do. But this is different. It has to be different! She’s a druid! The worst sort of heretic!”
“Yeah, I get that. I aint gonna argue that with ye. Ye tell me them druids are the worst and we gotta kill them, and if that’s the way it is, I’m with ye. But, does it have to be right away with this particular one? She weren’t wrong, what she was saying. She’s getting the same dreams as us. If there’s a goblin apocalypse coming, and I got a part to play in fighting it, ye don’t think she’d want me to do it?”
“How the fuck should I know what a druid wants!” Choke snapped.
“Well, d’ye think it’s goblins eating all her neighbors? Bristlenook seems like a pretty nice place, all things considered. And I know they’re all devil worshipers and all that, but that don’t mean they don’t want what’s best for themselves. And, then there’s what she was saying about the fire. Tell me if I’m wrong, here. This fire is old, right? Real old. That makes it older than Stron. Than our religion. Right?”
“Yes, that probably is so. But that doesn’t mean—”
“Doesn’t mean what? That there couldn’t be people worshiping it before there were Stronians like us? From what Diya was saying, these Druids worship the same fire. Or, some of them do, anyways. That’s the feeling I got watching Hargarl look at whatever he was seeing in my brands. It was like he was seeing his god.”
“Okay now, that’s enough!” Choke raised up, slamming his hand down on the bench next to him. “This is blasphemy!”
“Just because it’s blasphemy don’t mean it’s wrong,” Peep said calmly.
“What? What are you saying? It is the deepest sort of wrong! It couldn’t be more wrong! The Holy Fire within you is not a druid god!”
“Settle down, dipshit! Listen to what I’m really saying! Think for a second. I aint saying it’s a druid god. I’m saying that some of the druids seem to worship it as one. That’s just fact, aint it? They worship the sun, too. That’s Altas, aint it? So does them worshiping Altas mean that he’s a druid or a Solluna Union god? No. It means they’re fucked up. But that don’t mean that they don’t take it serious. They believe it, don’t they? They let Stronians burn them up rather than say they’re wrong about it. Don’t they?”
“Yes, that is so. Okay, I see what you’re saying. I’m sorry. You’re right.”
“Yeah, I know. So, what I’m saying is, we got this goblin apocalypse, or whatever, coming soon. And we got Sneed and the Outfit to deal with. So why go out of our way to fuck with someone that can kill us, when they aint doing shit to us. Ye basically said the same thing yarself a couple days ago,” Peep said.
“Okay. Yes. I see what you’re saying. I even agree with you. To a point. But you made an agreement with a druid. There is no way that can be right. And how do we know that this information she’s given you isn’t leading you into a trap?”
“Well, we don’t. But, it would be kinda weird, seeing as she coulda just killed us whenever she wanted. Why fuck around with all this shit?”
“Perhaps so that we can be taken alive. Like the Outfit wants,” Choke answered.
This gave Peep pause.
“Yeah. That would track. But…” she drifted off as she thought about it. She settled her mind on it quickly, though. “No. No. I felt it with that pulse. She’s being truthful. The fire got her. She’s gonna do what she said. I’m sure of it.”
“The Holy Fire tells you this?”
“Yeah. I feel it. And we don’t gotta take her word on it. Not all of it. Tomorrow, I’ll head out there to the end of the North Ridge and check out this Gorefield place. Maybe me and Pinch should check it out together. See if it fits what she said.”
“Peep, you understand that with her animal helpers, she can know exactly where you are. If you go precisely to the place she told you about, how is this not playing directly into a trap?”
“Yeah, I guess yar right. But, with all that being true, she don’t really need to send us anyplace, does she? If she’s really thrown in with the Outfit, then we’re fucked anyways. Pretty much any time we leave town. And if that’s so, why didn’t she do it earlier, with the Chisel? No. She didn’t give a shit enough before to get active with the Outfit. And now, the gobo dreams are driving her mental, and Hargarl pissed in her ear about the Holy Fire. She’s gonna help us. Just you wait and see. She’ll send Barrelmender her gesture of goodwill, whatever that is. And I wanna have a notion of how to set up on Gorefield when she does. Ye gotta trust me, man.”
“No, I don’t. But I will. And it’s not all up to me, you know. Barrelmender will have his say. And as dismissive of him as we have been, he is a Brother of the Holy Stone. He is our magistrate, as well. We must do as he says.”
“No doubt. So, we’ll see what he says.”
“I will not let you try to hoodwink him, Peep. We must tell him everything. The whole truth,” Choke said, meeting Peep’s eye seriously.
“No shit. Do ye wanna lay any money down on whether he gives a fuck one way or the other?” Peep smirked.
“No, I do not. Okay, I suppose it is about lunchtime. I’m famished. Let’s go eat,” Choke said, holding his hand out to Peep.
She slapped his palm with hers. There was no pulse between them this time, but the touch of the brand settled Choke. Together, they went to the barracks to have their lunch.
Muse Vassal 