Table of Contents – (spoilers)
“Well aint that something!” Peep exclaimed happily to Choke as they walked around the side of the of the Bristlehump church, heading for the front. “Barrelmender might actually be shaping up to be worth a shit!”
“It seems so. Hold up,” Choke said, gesturing for Peep to stop. There had been no followers in the back of the church, and they could now hear some of them out in the town square.
“Now, how do you want to handle Shasta?” Choke asked.
“I don’t,” Peep answered, deadpan. “We don’t fuckin need her right now. Barrelmender’s the man, and he says my followers get the Wilson place. So we get them settled in there, working on the place right away. Shasta don’t need to be a part of that.”
“Okay. I can see that. In the short term. But we agreed to talk to her about being the property manager for the church here.”
“We agreed? Fuck that, dood. You did that.”
“What’s the problem, Peep? When we talked about this yesterday, you were fine with it,” Choke said.
“Was I? I guess I didn’t think it over yet. Why the fuck are we keeping her? You fuckin hate her, and Barrelmender beat the shit outta her and kicked her out. Problem fuckin solved,” Peep said, clearly earnest in her confusion.
“It’s not as simple as all that,” Choke snapped.
“Why not? What, because of the property and shit? Fuck, man, we can do that for him. And if ye wanna be a pussy about it, we don’t even have to skim anything. Which ye know fuckin well Shasta has been. And will keep doing, for that matter.”
“No, it’s not that. It’s the children. If Barrelmender repudiates their mother completely, they will be the ones to suffer.”
“Yeah… so? What am I missing here? What is it with you and kids, man? It aint our fuckin problem.”
“What are you talking about, Peep?” Choke yelled, barely holding on to his emotions. “I am an orphan! We are all orphans!”
“Right. Who the fuck aint? Who gives a shit? They got a mom. It aint yar responsibility, man.”
“You’re right. It’s Barrelmender’s. He is their father, and he has decided to keep Shasta on as his property manager. That is his decision to make. And I support him in that!” Choke shouted in Peep’s face.
She blinked at him for a moment.
“Okay,” she said. “So I’ll go and talk to her. Set her straight.”
Choke flinched as the tension left his body. “No. I’m sorry, Peep. I’m sorry I yelled at you. I apologize.”
“Uh-huh. Don’t worry about it. It’s nothing, man.”
“No, I am sorry. And you don’t have to talk to Shasta. I’ll do it. It’s my responsibility,” Choke said.
“No. I aint letting you negotiate with that bitch. Are ye nuts? Not the way yar bleeding out over this shit, man. Ye can come along with me if ye want, but I’m the one doing the talking. Clear?”
“Alright then. But we are leaving that family a living.”
“I understand. We are gonna continue having the Church support the drunk priest’s corrupt slut and their bastard children. Because that’s the right thing to do,” Peep grinned at Choke.
“Oh… fuck you, Peep. Really?” Choke deflated, now looking at a complete loss.
“Sorry, dood. Ye think Father M would see it another way? But I don’t give a shit, man. I’m just fucking with ye,” Peep laughed.
“Why?”
“I dunno. Because that’s what friends do, aint it? Okay, let’s go get the ducklings sorted,” Peep slapped Choke across the hip before heading out to the front of the church.
Mariola had gathered all of Peep’s followers on the church’s front steps. They had all their belongings with them, packed up and ready to go. They stood up and clustered around Peep as she approached them. The flock kept their distance, but just barely, as they stared at her with wide eyes.
Peep took a deep breath and exhaled a long sigh before she could address them.
“Okay, people. Ye can’t be here at the church anymore, except for Mass. Yar driving the Brother even more crazy, and as funny as that is, we need him heading in the other direction. So, we got ye a place to fix up. It’s some kinda farm nearby here. It needs work. Yar gonna do that, and start farming, I guess. If ye don’t know about doing that, ye can also hunt and fish and do whatever it was ye did before ye started all this following me around business. So… yeah… that’s uhhh… that’s what we’re doing now,” Peep drifted off.
Her followers continued to stare at her.
“So. Okay. Stron! Bless these good people! Let them take up the Wilson property and do you justice with all their hard work! Amen!”
Peep traced the Wheel above her followers with her open palm.
“Amen! Amen!” they exclaimed.
Several of them collapsed with the excitement of the blessing. Others took to their bobbing up and down as they wailed and moaned.
“Yeah! Great!” Peep yelled. She snapped her fingers and pointed to Mariola. “Mariola! With me!”
Peep led Mariola far enough away from her followers on the church steps. The spectacle had attracted a small crowd of villagers who were silently watching the spasms of faith.
“Okay. Mariola. Ye heard what I said. Yar all getting a rundown farm property to fix up and live off. I don’t know if any of these dipshits know shit about farming, but just do yar best. Anyways, the Church’ll continue to keep ye fed, so it aint a life-or-death affair.”
“Okay. Where is it?” Mariola asked.
“I dunno. Figuring that out is next. Also, if yar okay with it, the Brother wants ye to stay on as his housekeeper. Just a couple of hours every morning. Ye come and cook up his breakfast and lunch and then ye can fuck off back to the farm, or wherever. How’s that sound?”
“I suppose it’s fine. And do you want me to continue managing your other followers, Peep?”
“Yeah. Speaking of that: is there anything I should know about? Any problems?”
“No. Nothing that warrants your attention. They are…” Mariola paused, her face contorted as she thought about her next words. “They’re very simple people.”
“Yeah. No shit. Just do yar best. And while yar at it, watch out for moon worshipers and people talking about worshiping trees and shit like that. They aint our kind. Not anymore, anyways,” Peep muttered to herself. Then something more occurred to her:
“How’s Barrelmender been?” Peep asked.
“The Brother? Well, he’s… not simple.”
Peep chuckled at this. “Yeah. I know what ye mean. But yar okay helping him out? Ye don’t have to do that if ye don’t want.”
“No, it’s fine. He’s been good to me. Once I got used to the yelling. He does have a soft side, you know. He’s been kind to me, too. In his way.”
“Yeah, I’m sure ye get to see the soft side of all kinds a men. Just don’t do anything stupid with him. We’re trying to get him straightened out, and apparently these Stronian Church men aren’t allowed women. For some stupid reason.”
“Peep. Come on!” Mariola laughed. “Are ye kidding? I would never! Not with him!”
“Okay, then. Good. And he shouldn’t be drinking. If he starts, don’t try to stop him. Just let us know about it. Okay?”
“Okay. I got it,” Mariola gave Peep a thumbs up.
“Good. Thank ye. I appreciate it. Alright, let’s move out!” Peep shouted to all her followers.
Peep, Choke, and Mariola led the Holy Wailers to the military barracks. On the way, Choke and Mariola walked together. They exchanged shy glances with one another until awkwardly attempting a short conversation on the weather.
At the barracks, the men were all gone to continue clearing the bush away from the palisade, leaving just the two men at the north gate.
“Hey!” Peep barked at one of them. “Did Gabe show up today?”
“Who, sir?”
“Gabe. The local kid who’s been with us.”
“Oh. Him. No, sir.”
“He’s probably working his still, Peep, since that’s what we told him to do unless otherwise instructed,” Choke said.
“Oh, shit. That’s right.” Peep turned to Mariola: “Okay. Ye all chill out here for now. We’re gonna go and send the Gabe kid back here. He’s gonna take ye to the Wilson place.”
“And we’re gonna move in there today?” Mariola asked.
“Yeah. Figure it out. Shouldn’t be too far away. Figure out what yar gonna need and we’ll sort ye out later.”
“Later when? Later today? It’s an abandoned farm, right? We’re gonna need food, for one. And some kinda shelter. Does the place have buildings left standing?”
“How the fuck should I know? I aint seen the fuckin place! Figure it out! But… yeah. Food. Shit. Okay, we’ll get ye sorted on that. Okay, fuck it. Grab what ye need for the next couple of days from the storeroom here. Some basic pots and shit, too. Then, we’ll come down and check it out this afternoon. See if ye need any hand with shelter. Maybe some tents for now, or something. Okay?”
“Okay, Peep. That should do. Thank you,” Mariola said.
“Okay, Gabe should come up shortly to take ye there. Grab what ye need from the storeroom off the kitchen back there. Right? Me and LT have other shit to do this morning, so that’s it for us. Right?”
“Got it. Thank you,” Mariola said.
“Right. Let’s go!” Peep swatted Choke as she turned to head for the stables.
Choke and Mariola shared another awkward smile and a bit of a wave before Choke followed Peep.
Choke and Peep quickly saddled Nike and Gorgeous Boy. They rode out the south gate with their full combat gear and went the short distance to the area where the rest of the platoon was working to clear the forest at least twenty meters back from the town’s log palisade. The men were well into the swing of it now, working hard with two mules and Knuckle’s original, big riding horse bridled for pulling logs out. Choke quickly informed Pinch and Knuckle what was happening. Then, he and Peep rode down the hump to Babs and Balan’s place. There, they found Gabe working his still and, once they had ascertained that he knew where the old Wilson place was, instructed him to head up to town and guide Peep’s followers there.
With everything taken care of, the task of parlaying with Shasta could be put off no longer. Peep and Choke rode the short distance to her little property on the Bristle Creek. They rode in silence. For his part, Choke’s mind was consumed with thoughts as turbulent and muddy as the creek.
At Shasta’s gate Peep called out:
“Hallo! It’s us! Otilla and Bartholomew! Ye here, Shasta?”
It took just a second for the two children to appear from around the back to the cottage. They quickly disappeared back the way they came. After about a minute, they came back out, about halfway to the gate.
“Mom says she can’t come to let ye in,” the boy said. “She said to go around back. Also, don’t let the cow out!”
Peep and Choke let themselves into the gate and tethered their horses to the tree at the front of the cottage. They went around back to the pleasant patio where Shasta had first attempted to entertain them. The swollen Bristle Creek looked dangerously close to breaking its bank just behind the hedges at the edge of the patio. As before, there was a wooden table with some chairs and a bench.
Shasta came hobbling out of the back door of the cottage with her children behind her. She leaned heavily on a rough crutch fashioned from a tree branch.
“Uh-huh!” she said loudly. “Well, there ye are! Come to lay some more abuse on me, no doubt! Sit down, then! Sit down!”
Choke, and then Peep, obliged her. Peep dragged a chair a little to the side so that she could see straight through the small cottage, out the front window to their horses. Shasta took note of the cautious move with a raised eyebrow, but otherwise chose to let it pass. She grunted in pain as she settled her bulk onto the bench against the cottage wall.
“I can’t serve ye any food! Not in my condition! We’re already suffering the charity of others to keep us fed. We can have some beer, though. No shortage of that here, now. Now that the pious Brother has decided to take himself back to his church to puff himself up with his airs. Like he’s any better than the likes of us! Boy! Fill up a jug! And three mugs!” Shasta shouted at her son.
In looking Shasta over, it did not seem that she had been beaten, at least not around the face. However, the way she moved, she was clearly in pain, as she shifted this way and that on the bench in an attempt to find a tolerable position.
“I am sorry to bother you, ma’am,” Choke said. “Are you alright?”
“No, I’m not alright, ye stupid jink prick! Yar hero up there beat me like a convict! Great man! Great man! Look at what yar great man of Stron did to me!”
Shasta leaned back and raised up her dress just about to her crotch to show off her legs. Both were bruised from calf to thigh, but her right thigh had clearly taken the brunt of Barrelmender’s fury. There were deep, black and blue contusions all over it, with halos of yellow around them.
“Oh, shit,” Peep said, giving a low whistle.
“Oh, no. I am sorry—” Choke started.
“Yar sorry!” Shasta shouted at him. “Yar sorry! When yar the one he did it for! To impress ye in his great piety and return to the spirit of the faith! He drug me by my hair out into the square and beat my legs with that stick of his right out there in front of everybody! And left me there to be dragged back here by cackling villagers like some kinda fuckin cripple! And yar the sorry one, are ye?”
Shasta collapsed back and flicked her dress back down to cover her brutalized legs.
“Man, that is some work,” Peep said. “Ye look like ye got trampled by a horse team! I’m impressed that he had the stamina for it. Man, if this is the kinda beating he can output now, he musta been something in his prime, huh?”
“Peep… please,” Choke said as Shasta glared murder at Peep.
At this point, the boy returned with the jug of ale, with his sister following with the three mugs. Choke sprang up to serve the ale while Shasta and Peep stared at each other.
“Oh, yar a hard bitch, huh?” Shasta growled at Peep.
“You know it. Cheers!” Peep said cheerfully, raising up her mug of ale. She burped with a grin after draining half of it.
Shasta snorted and drained her whole mug. Then she tossed it to Choke for a refill.
“That’s Bab’s ale, huh?” Peep said. “Good shit. That’s delivered here as part of the parish rent, right? Along with everything else ye’ve been living on. I have that right, don’t I?”
Shasta glared at Peep for a while before responding:
“Fuck you, bitch. Let’s just get on with it.”
“With what?” Peep asked mildly as Choke handed Shasta her refilled mug.
“Yar here to burn me up as a witch for corrupting a man of Stron! Isn’t that so? Ye’ve been to town and met the Baron and the priests, and ye’ve had yar promotions, and now ye’ve come to clean up the mess. So just get on with it!” Shasta shouted at the top of her lungs as she finished.
Peep sat quietly and raised her eyebrows at this. She took another sip of ale and set the mug on the table before responding:
“Well, Shasta, I have to say, I am impressed. Laid up here as ye have been. And us in town just a day and a half now. And already ye heard all about us in Spitzer, and our new situation.”
“Yeah, I got people! I got people coming to help me in this time of trouble. And they tell me what’s going on. So I know he’s got a new doxy moved in with him up there! A right pretty one, brought for him special, by you who think that just because ye got Stron on yar side, ye can do just as ye like!”
“Hey now,” Peep said, raising a warning hand towards Shasta, showing her the Wheel brand in the palm. “I understand yar upset. But I’ll ask ye to watch what ye say about Stron and them that do His work. Ye might have heard a thing or two, but that don’t mean ye put the pieces together into the right picture. Ye got it twisted, woman.”
“Oh, is that so?”
“Yeah. That’s so. So listen to me real careful now, bitch, because I’m gonna set ye straight. One way, or the fuckin other,” Peep closed her fingers over the Wheel to point just the one straight at Shasta across the table.
This seemed to affect the woman more than the sight of the Holy Wheel had. Shasta’s mouth snapped shut.
Peep went on:
“When we went to Spitzer, first thing, we confessed all to Father Morrenthall. And he is a proper man of Stron. He is a cleric of the Knights of the Holy Sword. Been to see the Bishop in Strana, and everything. And in our confessions to him, he heard all about all of yar nonsense with Barrelmender. And then he sat down with us and the Baron and they worked things out between them and decided on what to do about everything. And before we come back here, we got our orders on what to do. And d’ye know what he wants done with ye, woman?” Peep asked, leaning in to stare at Shasta with hard eyes.
“No,” rasped Shasta after a very long silence that Peep clearly was not going to fill.
“Nothing. He don’t give a shit about ye. That man, Father Morrenthall, who spent a whole day teasing the sin outta a single fuckwit in chains just so’s he could burn it outta him for all to see. That man of Stron… didn’t say a fuckin word about ye. Not a word. They don’t give a shit. All they asked was if I wanted Barrelmender kept on. And I told them yes. We are bringing Barrelmender along. And that’s that.”
“What does that mean?” Shasta eventually asked.
“It means ye aint his woman no more. Ye keep the fuck away from him. And that’s my call. I’m backing his move. Because the two of ye are poison to the other. And I need him right in the head. So if you go fucking with his head anymore, I’m gonna end ye, bitch. And it aint gonna be about no fuckin witch burning, or public beatdown. It’s gonna be about clearing the trash away from him. About taking care of business. And I’ll get that shit done myself. Ye have my word on that. Because he’s our priest, and we need his head right. That’s it. Any fuckin questions?”
“Well, what about us? How are we supposed to live now?” Shasta asked, now dead calm herself.
“Ye got some fuckin sand, woman. I’ll give ye that,” Peep chuckled. “Well, seeing as ye have the balls to ask, I’ll tell ye. If ye want my honest word on what’s gonna be best for you and the kids, I think ye should pack the fuck up and head south. Because with what Father Morrenthall’s seen coming, and what I feel building up inside me… well… I don’t think any of this here is long for this world. It’s all gonna be something much, much worse. It aint gonna be our place no more…” Peep drifted off, her eyes glazing over.
Both Shasta and Choke stared at Peep, stricken in horror at the expression on her face. Then, the spell passed and Peep continued on as though nothing had happened:
“But, if yar not gonna do that, then we’ve decided that ye can stay on as the parish’s property manager.”
“What?” Shasta asked, stunned.
“Ye heard me. Ye can stay on that way. Yar done as his housekeeper, and as his woman, for that matter. But, ye can keep on doing the work for the church property,” Peep said.
Still stunned, Shasta gaped for a while before managing, “thank you… that’s… unexpected.”
“Yeah, no shit. Now, before ye go getting too excited, it aint gonna be the way it used to. We’re gonna sit down with Barrelmender and figure out what property there is and what it pays for rent. Then, our quartermaster, Sergeant Nikolas, is gonna sit down with ye and figure out where that all goes when it’s time to collect it. Ye’ll have a living from it, that’s sure. But all that comes in aint gonna be yours to do with as ye see fit. Not no more. Is that clear?”
“Yeah. That it is,” Shasta said, her usual sour demeanor once again rising.
“Good. Now, one more thing: I have some followers that, I guess, followed me from Spitzer. The Holy Fire Wailers I call them. The Brother has decided they’re to be given the Wilson property. They’re gonna live there and fix it up. And he said ye need to set them up with whatever tools and shit they’re gonna need to make a go of it. Does any of that make sense to ye?”
“Yeah… sure. I guess that’ll work.”
“Good. They’re also gonna need some food to get themselves going,” Peep said.
“Yeah, okay. They can draw what they need from the church granary up in town. Why not?” Shasta said, her tone now a gripe.
“Yeah. Why not? Okay, then. So that’s that. So, now I guess I’ll show ye some more of Stron’s mercy,” Peep said as she stood up.
Peep stepped around the table and moved towards Shasta, who flared up in alarm. Peep was too quick for her, however, and before the large woman could react, had dropped down to grip both of her knees with her hands.
“Stron! Heal this woman of her wounds so that she may serve you well as your parish’s property manager. Thank ye, Stron! Amen.”
Shasta gasped and Peep gave a small spasm of pleasure as the healing in Peep’s Wheel brands healed her legs.
“Alright, then,” Peep said as she stood up. “No more bitching about how ye’ve been so hard done by. We’re square now. So you see to it that it stays that way. Right?”
“Ah. Yes. Thank ye,” Shasta said as she stood up.
“Don’t thank me. Ye praise Stron, is what ye do, woman,” Peep said.
“Yes. Praise Stron!”
“Good. And just a reminder: Barrelmender don’t wanna see ye or talk to ye no more. And, more importantly, I don’t want that neither. So even if he has a change of heart, ye’d best steer fuckin clear of him going forward. Because if you fuck around with him and fuck him up some more, I’m gonna permanently revoke the good that Stron just did for ye here. Ye understand?”
“Yes. Understood. Even though I wasn’t the one that fucked him up, I’ll remind ye. He was a broken man long before I—”
“Shut up. What did I just say about no more bitching?” Peep said, not unkindly. “Ye two are done with each other. Move the fuck on. And ye do a good job for us, or we’ll find someone else who will. Clear?”
“Yes. Clear.”
“Good. Ye do know when to shut up! Now that yar up and about, get yarself to the Wilson place by tomorrow and see what our people need. We’ll be in touch,” Peep said.
She gave Shasta a friendly slap on the shoulder as she moved past her and out around to the front of the cottage. Choke rose and nodded to Shasta.
“Thank you, ma’am,” he said, before he followed Peep.
The two of them collected their horses and rode on back to Bristlehump.
Muse Vassal 