Table of Contents – (spoilers)
At the crest of the hill to the southwest of Cowslip Hollow’s swampy end, the Pekot Bunch stopped to take stock of things. As seemed to be usual in these parts, the crest of the hill ran for several hundred meters in a kind of ridge. It was forested and covered in numerous trails. The squad stopped at a bit of an open spot that had good visibility over several trails down both sides of the ridge.
“We’re on ambush,” Peep said as she dismounted. “Pinch, Gabe, Knuckle: lookout there, there, and there,” she pointed out the spots for each, looking down the main trails. “Choke, can ye give me a hand with my horse here? I wanna get this arrow treated.”
The lovely chestnut stallion Peep had taken from the Chisel’s bounty hunter had managed his wound admirably. Choke brought his cloak over and covered the stallion’s eyes as he gripped his bridle and soothed him with calming voice and gentle stroking.
“Do you have any healing left in your brands?” Choke asked Peep quietly as she brought over the medical kit.
“A bit, yeah. But that aint something we wanna use up on a horse when we’re out here like we are. Especially not since we got an extra one now.”
“The two are not remotely comparable,” Choke said, glancing back at the little hill horse. “He is a gorgeous boy, this one. And he needs a name.”
“A gorgeous boy, huh? When people call yar lot horsefuckers, they aint joking! Ye really lean into that, don’t ye!”
“Fuck you, Peep. Help the horse.”
“Okay. I’ll help Gorgeous Boy. But he don’t need no brand healing for this.”
Peep carefully extracted the arrow from newly named Gorgeous Boy and packed the wound with their medicinal honey salve. He nickered and jostled a bit during the extraction, but Choke was able to keep him calm.
As soon as she had packed up the medical case, Peep mounted up.
“Okay, let’s move. Down the hill that way,” she gestured to the trail down the hill to the southwest, taking them directly away from Cowslip.
“Ye don’t wanna lay up in ambush here?” Choke asked her.
“No. Not good. Any extra motherfuckers working through the bush to the south can flank us. We could get pinned down real easy. We push on hard for a couple hours and find a good ambush spot to lay up. If no one’s following, we’ll camp there for the night,” Peep said.
“And then what?”
“And then it’ll be tomorrow, is what. And we’ll see how that goes. Let’s move.”
As the squad formed up to head down the trail, Knuckle did a double take on Pinch:
“The fuck, man! Ye been crying?”
Pinch, who had been wiping tears and snot off his face, whirled on Knuckle:
“Fuck you!”
“What the fuck, man? What’re ye crying about?” Knuckle persisted.
“Percy! I was crying about Percy! Alright? Are ye happy now?” Pinch yelled.
“Hey! Quiet!” Peep snapped. She pointed down the trail. “Gabe. Yar with me. Let’s move.”
Peep and Gabe started down the trail working point, leaving the three Pekot boys to follow. They did so, continuing their conversation as they went.
“That’s right. Ye named yar horse Percy, even though she was a mare. That was such a dumbass move,” Knuckle laughed.
“Yeah, laugh it up, ye fuckin asshole!” Pinch exploded.
“Theodas, be nice,” Choke admonished.
“Quiet back there, I said!” Peep barked from the front. “Fuck sakes! Ye’d think ye guys want a horseshoe up yar ass, the way yar carrying on.”
“Yeah, I named her Percy,” Pinch continued, keeping his voice low now, but no less filled with feeling as he spat venom at Knuckle. “I wanted a stallion named Percy. So what? Yeah, I wanted to be a lancer, like Baron and Choke. Big fuckin joke, huh? Instead, I get a shitty little bow and a little mare that was almost too small to keep. Runt of the litter, the both of us. Always the hind teat. That’s me. Big fuckin joke. But she was mine. I raised her from a foal, the same way Choke did Nike and Baron did Striker. And you: they give ye a fuckin plow horse because nothing proper could carry ye, and ye couldn’t give a shit about him. Asshole,” Pinch finished.
“Whatever,” Knuckle muttered, as he patted his big horse, Elmer, on the neck.
“Percy was a good horse. You raised her well and she loved you. I’m sorry she died, Pinch,” Choke said after the moment had settled a little.
They rode on down the hill, through a little slough, and halfway up the next hill before Peep found a spot she liked. It was a good one. The trail they were on went around the bottom of an outcropping of rock that rose in a sharp cliff about four meters above the trail. At the top of that was a bit of a flat area with a steep slope and bigger trees above. They pushed on past the outcropping and looped back up onto it. There was just enough room for them, with their horses out of sight back in the trees.
“So, what do you reckon, Peep? Are they following us?” Choke asked.
Peep shrugged. “Well, we gave them a couple of real good lessons on why that’s a bad idea, so probably not.”
“Fuckin A, man!” Knuckle said, presenting his fist to her to bump. The rest of the squad joined in the gesture.
“Yeah, what was it ye said the plan was, Peep? Hit and fade, hit and fade. Don’t get stuck in. Wasn’t it?” Knuckle laughed. “So how was you running off through the bush on foot to go after the fuck that shot ye part of that plan?”
“It wasn’t. But sometimes ye gotta think on yar feet.”
“Fuckin rights. Ye said not to get stuck in, but look how good we are at it!” Knuckle happily pulled his warhammer from his belt loop. He frowned at some bloody skull and brain matter stuck to the head, and flicked it off.
“Fuck! This thing is awesome, man! Brother Brian always said this would bust assholes right up, but I didn’t expect it like that! That one guy’s head looked like a fuckin bowl of cabbage!”
“Yeah, well, yar a big boy. Ye might wanna clean up a bit, though. Ye still got a fair bit of them on ye,” Peep said, giving him a friendly elbow in the side.
Knuckle nodded and sat down to yank up bunches of grass to clean himself and his weapons with.
“That’s all great,” Pinch said, not looking like he thought it was great at all, “but how sure are we that no one is following us? They’ll have no problem tracking us, right?”
“Yeah, no doubt,” Peep answered. “There’s no real way to know. A twenty-gold payout is gonna attract a lot of bushrats. But we put, what, about twenty down today? And some proper ones; leaders, and the like. So anyone with any sense is gonna be thinking twice about crashing headlong after us. Right? But that doesn’t mean that there aint gonna be a bunch of fools out here that don’t know no better. We’ll set up ambush here and wait and see.”
The crew did that, with Peep and Gabe laying at the top of the stone outcropping. Knuckle and Choke were further back out of sight, but ready to pop up with their longbows. Still wanting to be alone, Pinch volunteered to stay at the rear and keep lookout on the trail to the west.
As they waited, they chewed their way through their lunch and dinner of trail rations.
“So, about the bandits we faced today,” Choke said quietly after some time. “They were on the serious side. Yes?”
“Yeah, I’d say so. Not as serious as Goldy or that bunch. But they weren’t nothing, neither,” Peep answered.
“So we did well. That went well,” Choke said.
“Yeah. It did. We did great.”
“Now, just to confirm, no one saw Sneed, right? Or any of the men he had with him at Tully’s this morning?” Choke asked.
They all shook their heads.
“Nah. They’re still out in the weeds,” Peep said. “We gotta be real fuckin careful on our approach back to town, because all four of them bad boys might be set up with the Chisel and Tully’s boys.”
“So, about that bunch. How coordinated do you think all this has been? By that I mean: were all those bandits today under Sneed’s orders? Or the Chisel’s? Or, were they operating independently?” Choke asked.
Peep thought about this for a while.
“These are all good questions,” she eventually said. “What I would reckon is that the bunch set up by the barn were put there by Sneed directly. Right? They’re assuming that at some point we’re gonna ride out to the trading post on patrol. Sneed and his main goons sit at Tully’s to wait that out, because what better place to do that if yar a piece of shit like them? Then, the guy set to tail us from town goes and alerts the bunch with the dogs that are at a camp further back in the bush.”
Peep paused to think about all this for another long moment.
“So, think about how that plays if we don’t go out on a thunder run. If we just do it slow and careful,” she continued. “We ride out slow, pop into Tully’s to piss in their ear and fuck with Sneed and Dixon.”
“Oh, right! The lieutenant. That horny fuck!” Knuckle exclaimed.
“Quiet! We’re on ambush, remember?” Peep admonished him. Then she continued: “So, they figure we’ll take it easy heading to Tully’s. Then we push on towards the outpost. Meanwhile, the rider has gone to get the bunch with the dogs outta the bush. We ride into the farm ambush right as the second bunch close in from behind. So even if we spot the ambush, we get jacked up from behind while we’re dealing with it. Sneed and his three doods can join in to hit us wherever or whenever they want. It was a good plan. We just fucked it up by moving fast. So, good call on the thunder run, boss!” Peep tugged her forelock as she dipped her head to Choke in a deep nod.
Choke gave Peep an exaggerated, regal wave of acknowledgement.
“So, to get back to yar first question, all them doods today were on Sneed’s leash,” Peep continued. “The rider following us from town and then ducking out to get the bunch from the bush proves it. There’s no way he wasn’t with Sneed.”
“So, we kill Sneed on sight, then,” Knuckle said.
“Yes,” Peep replied.
“No. We do not,” Choke said.
“What? Explain that,” said Peep, her tone neutral.
“We have no evidence that Sneed was involved. To go after him we need proof.”
“What are ye talking about? It’s obvious,” Peep said.
“That it may be. But we are agents of law. And as such, it is not what we know that matters, it is what we can prove. If we kill Sneed, who is the teamster’s security chief for this area, they will have ample cause to come after us for murder,” Choke said.
Knuckle was clearly angry at this, but held his tongue as he looked to Peep to make their case for direct action. However, contrary to how Peep had typically reacted to this sort of conversation, this time she eased back and lapsed into further thought.
“Yeah… Okay,” she finally said. “I can see that. So, what do we do, then?”
Both Knuckle and Choke blinked in surprise at her reasonable participation in earnest dialogue.
“Well, we gather evidence. And before you argue about this, Knuckle, keep in mind that it will be work you shall enjoy,” Choke said.
“Gather evidence. What does that mean?” Peep asked.
“Well, we either have to see Sneed collude with people we know to be bandits, or we need a bandit to truthfully give evidence that he has done such.”
“Truthfully give evidence, huh? That’s the work Knuckle’s gonna enjoy, I take it?” said Peep.
“No doubt. We get our hands on a bandit, or several, and put them to the question. Then, we take them to Barrelmender for him to hear their honest testimony. Then, he should issue us a warrant on Sneed. Only then do we go and kill him on sight. That is the process,” Choke finished.
“Sounds a real faff. But, if ye say that’s how it is, that’s how it is. We wanna be staying on the right side of the law, I suppose,” Peep said.
Knuckle snorted at this.
“No shit, Knucklehead. I been on the wrong side of the law, and let me tell ye, I aint looking to go back,” Peep said.
“Indeed. Just look at what’s become of the Chisel, trying to play both sides in a grey zone. And now he’s a bandit we are hunting down,” Choke said.
“Oh, is that what he is?” Pinch spoke up from the rear of the group. “He aint the one hunting us?”
“Of course he isn’t. He just thinks he is. We shall disabuse him of that notion shortly,” Choke said with a smile.
“Ha!” Knuckle barked.
“No doubt. Fuckin A,” Peep said. “So, as far as getting our hands on some bandits goes: if any don’t come here to present themselves to us, tomorrow we should try to find the camp of the last bunch with the dogs. They weren’t that far up the hill south of Bristlehump, so it shouldn’t be hard to find. We’ll loop around south and come up from the bush side. D’ye know that area, Gabe?”
Gabe startled to be suddenly included in the discussion.
“Ma’am! Yes, Miss Otilla. I know all that area well. There’s a few spots they might’ve used, but it shouldn’t be hard to find it. We’ll need to be sneaky, though.”
“Yeah, no shit. Okay, good. And, as long as we’re gathering evidence, there’s something else we could run down. At the farm today, that bitch was signaling the bushwhackers. We oughta have a talk to them farmers and find out why that was,” Peep said.
Knuckle scowled at this. “What? That woman? She was just waving at her kids, wasn’t she?”
Peep laughed. “Fuck, Knuckle, throw a pair of tits on someone and ye’ll believe anything they’re selling, huh?”
“Yeah, it’s just too bad for you that ye don’t got none,” Knuckle shot back at her.
Gabe’s eyes bugged out at this abuse of a holy vessel.
“Dood, I don’t need tits to keep a handle on you, ye fuckin simpleton,” Peep laughed.
“Okay, so is this our plan?” Choke interjected. “Tomorrow, we try to creep up on what’s left of the bandit camp on the south hill. Then we slip down to the farm and see what’s been happening there. That’s the plan.”
“Sounds about right to me. I mean, even if the bandits have bugged out, I’m gonna wanna see the trail they took from camp to that farm, anyway. And whatever happens, that’ll be enough of a patrol for this outing. Right?” Peep asked the group.
They all concurred.
The afternoon and evening passed uneventfully, with no sign of any humans or creatures around, hostile or otherwise. In the fading light of evening, the squad took their horses back down to the slough to water them. Then they went back up to the ambush site and unsaddled them for the night.
“Hey, score!” Peep said as she noticed the bandit horn on Pinch’s new saddle.
The horn was fashioned of a large mountain ram’s horn, and was finely carved with an antler mouthpiece and some decorative inlay of semi-precious stones.
“That’s a nice fuckin horn ye got yarself there,” Peep said to Pinch.
“Yeah, whatever,” he muttered.
Peep shrugged.
“We sleeping armored tonight?” Knuckle asked Choke as they spread out their bedrolls under some trees.
Choke sighed as he rolled his head back to stretch his neck and shoulders.
“I think we should rest proper,” Peep said. “If Sneed and the Chisel have figured out how to creep up on us tonight, being armored probably aint gonna help us out much. Big day tomorrow. We gotta be fresh.”
“Good thinking,” Choke said, as he gestured for Knuckle to start helping him out of his chainmail.
“Same watch order as before, right?” Knuckle asked.
“Can’t see why not,” Peep answered.
“We giving youngster here a watch?” he asked.
Peep shook her head, prompting Gabe to slump in frustration with a hard sigh.
“Nope. Sorry kid, you aint earned that yet. Ye wanna take a watch, ye can double up with Pinch on his. He goes third, and that’s when them horse-thieving fucks made their run at us. So, it can’t hurt to have an extra set a eyes up around then. Right?”
Gabe nodded. “Of course, Miss Otilla.”
“Okay, then, I’ll wake the both of you up,” Choke said to Gabe and Pinch.
With this, Knuckle took his position at the top of the outcropping with his longbow and the hooded lantern which he turned down low and shuttered. The other four got into their bedrolls. As they lay quiet, waiting for sleep to come, something occurred to Peep.
“Hey, Choke. What if we gather up the evidence we need and take it to Barrelmender and he doesn’t do shit with it? What if ye can’t get him riled up enough to do his job?”
Choke thought about this for a long moment before he answered:
“Well, Peep, if that happens, then all is lost here and we need to reconsider things.”
Peep grunted her agreement to this. Then the four in their bedrolls drifted off to sleep with Knuckle watching over them.
Muse Vassal 